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I Can’t Breathe

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October 2021
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« Jan

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for most of my life i’ve fantasized about being a ballerina. i did ballet in elementary school and was a lyrical dancer in middle school, where i perfected my splits. i never did pointe or danced for an academy, but the ballerina in me begs to be freed. when i’m standing, in third position. when i listen to “honey” by halsey, in a pirouette. when i reach up to kiss the one i love, in relevé. the physical body transforms into a lyrical masterpiece. the manifestation of my emotion - energy in motion - into physical fluidity. enjoy these snapshots of me in my elemental form. one piece by @outdoorvoices 🖤

i stripped down to my bones and saw all the ways time had etched into my skin. like water and wind carve ribbons into rock, i too bear the markings of my past. i wasn’t always like this— i used to be soft, porous, malleable. i’m still young but boy, have i experienced life deserving of my age. i feel strong. the other day i picked myself up off the ground and gave myself a hard look in the mirror. “no one is coming to save you,” i said. and my bones stared back at me and agreed. my heart is strong. my mind lapses from time to time but i always choose to get back up. it’s not that it has no other choice, but that it consciously chooses to do so. the skin, the muscle, the tenderness underneath it all, the layers peeled away with time, and regrown stronger than before. i’m proud of the work i put in, even on the days that don’t feel like work. not at least, but at most. at most, i change. at most, i reach my dreams and then dream again. at most, i feel every ounce of life. at most, i am a higher evolvement of me.

valle de guadalupe⁣

rosarito / popotla / valle de guadalupe⁣⁣

hello sweet ones. dang, i can’t believe i last posted in june 🥲 a lot has changed. mainly, that i bought a house and am now a permanent resident of san diego!

about time i document my pretty little home 🏠 ~ everything tagged for ya ~

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